How to Focus on Your Children’s Needs During Your Divorce

 Posted on August 11, 2023 in Divorce

Divorce can be difficult, not just for spouses who are ending their marriage but also for their children. It is important to remember that children are often caught in the middle of divorce proceedings, and they may struggle to cope with the changes they will be required to make in their lives. In these situations, they can experience a wide range of difficult emotions, such as confusion, sadness, anger, and even guilt. As you address the many legal and financial issues that will play a role in your divorce, and as you make adjustments to living situations, daily routines, and other parts of your life, it is crucial to prioritize your children's well-being and ensure that their needs are met. Here are some tips on how to focus on your children's needs during this difficult time:

1. Communicate Openly and Honestly

Effective communication is key when addressing your child's concerns during a divorce. Take the time to have open conversations with them about what is happening using age-appropriate language. Be honest without sharing unnecessary details or placing blame on either parent. Encourage questions from your child and provide reassurance that they will always be loved and supported.

2. Maintain Routines

Divorce disrupts the family dynamic, which can leave children feeling uncertain about what lies ahead. To alleviate some of these anxieties, try to maintain consistent routines as much as possible throughout the divorce process while letting children know what to expect. Following regular schedules for mealtimes, bedtimes, school activities, visits with friends or extended family members, and other daily activities can provide structure and stability in children’s lives and ease some of the stress and uncertainty they are experiencing.

3. Foster Healthy Coping Mechanisms

Your children may struggle with expressing their emotions during your divorce. They may not fully understand what is happening, and depending on their ages, they may not yet have developed the ability to articulate their feelings effectively. You can help them understand and react to their emotions by encouraging healthy coping skills, such as expressing themselves through art or writing, participating in physical activities like sports or dancing, and talking to trusted adults such as teachers or counselors. These outlets can help them process their feelings in healthy ways while ensuring that they can receive support and guidance when needed.

4. Avoid Putting Children in the Middle

Divorce can often lead to conflicts between parents. However, as you work to resolve issues related to child custody or other related concerns, it is essential to shield your children from any heated disputes. Avoid speaking negatively about your ex-spouse in front of your children, asking children to take sides, or using them as messengers between you and your spouse. By shielding your children from adult issues, you can give them the space they need to focus on their own well-being instead.

5. Encourage Healthy Relationships

During your divorce, it is important to help ensure that your children will be able to maintain healthy relationships with both parents whenever possible. You can do so by encouraging them to spend time with the other parent when carrying out regular visitation or custody arrangements, and you can allow them to have phone calls or video chats with the other parent whenever they want. You can also foster relationships with extended family members such as grandparents, aunts, uncles, or cousins, which can make sure your children will be loved and supported by important people in their lives. By supporting your children as they maintain strong family relationships, you can help ensure that they will feel secure and loved while minimizing feelings of loss or abandonment.

6. Seek Professional Support

If you find that your child is struggling emotionally during the divorce process, you may want to consider seeking professional help from child therapists, school counselors, or support groups for families going through divorce. These resources can provide assistance in helping children navigate their emotions and adjust during this challenging time. 

Contact Our Tarrant County Family Law Attorney

At Daniel R. Bacalis, P.C., we understand that the divorce process can be overwhelming for both you and your children. Our experienced Hurst divorce lawyer is here to help you navigate through the legal issues involved in ending your marriage, and he can advise you on the best ways to protect your children’s interests as you make decisions about how to proceed with your case. We will work with you to make sure you can complete your divorce successfully and be the parent your children need in the years to come. Contact us at 817-498-4105 to schedule your free consultation. We are here to listen to your needs and provide you with legal support throughout the divorce process.